Charlie and the Chocolate Factory – Loompa Land


Daddy, look over there! What is it? It’s a little person. Over there, by the waterfall. There’s two of ’em. There’s more than two. Where do they come from? Who are they? Are they real people? Of course they’re real people, they’re Oompa-Loompas. Oompa-Loompas? Imported. Direct from Loompaland. There’s no such place. What? Mr Wonka, I teach high school geography and I’m here to tell you- Well, then you’ll know all about it and know what a terrible country it is. The whole place is nothing but thick jungles, infested by the most dangerous beasts in the entire world. Hornswogglers and snozzwangers… …and those terrible wicked wangdoodles. I went to Loompaland looking for exotic new flavours for candy. Instead, I found the Oompa-Loompas. The lived in treehouses to escape from the fierce creatures who lived below. The Oompa-Loompas ate nothing but green caterpillars, which tasted revolting. The Oompa-Loompas kept looking for other things to mash up with the caterpillars to make them taste better. Red beetles, the bark of the bong bong tree, all of them beastly, but not quite so beastly as the caterpillars. But the food they longed for the most was the cocoa bean. An Oompa-Loompa was lucky if he found three or four cocoa beans a year. But oh how they craved them. All they’d ever think about was cocoa beans. The cocoa bean happens to be the thing from which chocolate is made, so I told the chief: They are such wonderful workers. I feel I must warn you though, they are rather mischievous. Always making jokes. *laughter*

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